Mr. Besilly's Blog

Scott Is Not Only A Good Friend, He's A Great One!

I wanted to call my friend Scott this morning and tell him what an amazing time I had last night with his family at dinner. I met Scott, his wife Liz, and two daughters Emily and Hilary when they lived across the street as our neighbors for way too short a time. They've since moved a few blocks away which means our visits can't be random sidewalk talks anymore, they have to be scheduled.

If you placed Scott in a line-up with a bunch of other guys and asked me to pick out a new friend, it would be difficult for me to identify him as one of great ones. I've always been totally blind that way. But being neighbors for several years made my pick much easier. In fact, our friendship seemed inevitable, because we're both loud and love to talk. Did I mention that we also laugh really loud too?

Take A Picture of Your Life...

I came across this photo on Post Secret today and it immediately captured my heart. It left a small dent in my soul when I realized how true it is. I shoot photos often, but rarely do I point the lens at my own life, at the things that are meaningful to me.

I shoot mostly striking sunsets, lake reflections or light bursting through a wall of trees. I'm really glad now that I took so many pictures of my family this summer while on vacation in California and with my wife Terri on our trip to Spain. Life does change way too fast and it's easy to forget what truly matters.

The idea in this photo is beautiful, it's simple and for me it affirms the power of our lives when we rub up against each other. Sometimes for only a passing moment, but the impact can linger for a lifetime.

Thank you for this gift anonymous person living on planet earth. You made my day. You matter.

When Life Begins To Imitate Love

"When you are so gracious and generous and aware that you think of other people before yourself, you matter."  Seth Godin

It's been sometime since I've posted anything meaningful here on One Man's Highway. This life affirming story "Just Keep Going", written by my close friend David Goad, is one that should not go unnoticed. It's a moving tale that involves his daily ride to work on a commuter train, but on this one ordinary day, David crashes head on into the extraordinary.

"I suddenly snapped out of my bubble.  Here was some homeless kid, riding the ACE commuter train with a bunch of 40-something executives like me, just trying to get from one place to the next.  To be honest, I usually walk right by homeless people, occasionally throwing a buck or two into a can."  David Goad

When life begins to imitate love, the kind of love that places someone else above ourselves, it's only then that we begin to realize the deepest human connections in this world. Equals in our own human condition.

Thank you David. You matter.

When The Giving Gets Tough

“The only wealth which you will keep forever is the wealth, you have given away.” Marcus Aurelius

Regardless of how much personal wealth we individually possess we have each been granted great power for change. While it makes sense right now to take a position of caution managing our personal finances, we must resist the temptation to stop giving.

The power I'm speaking of has more to do with your own ability to influence the life of someone who is in need of your wealth. One measure of tested insight can cause ripples of growth and change for someone who lacks your super powers. You possess a unique wealth of knowledge, experience and influence that to others is like gold. Your wisdom can be a game changer to the less fortunate.

When I look at my experience working as a creative director or with raising two teenagers, I see no end to the wealth of knowledge I have within reach. I have an abundance to give, even if it's as simple as encouraging someone by taking a call or answering an email that would otherwise be easier to ignore living in this age of instant communication.

I encourage you to open up your life today and give a portion of your wealth. Give something that's meaningful, a part of you that will multiply through the lives of others. Don't hold back. You have so much more to offer than what you're electronically pushing to the bank. When we measure our ability to give by our bank statements, our true wealth and value is ignored.

How much do you really have to give?

 Photo by Ulrich Mueller

Once Upon A Time In My American Dream

1 Once upon a time, computers were really large, had very little memory and were extremely expensive. Now computers are really cheap, compact and have tons of memory. They've become an addictive obsession, stealing the time we used to spend together just hanging out.

2 Once upon time, there was no way to call or text someone from a crowded movie theater, a bathroom stall or a baseball game. Those events were considered sacred. Now with cell phones no event is considered sacred, not even a funeral.

The Thing About Dad

After visiting my Father in the hospital on July 18, 2004 it was less than a month before he passed away. I wasn't present when he passed but I heard his family was right there by his side. I'll never forget that last visit we had together. When Dad heard that my older brother Carl and I had arrived he had tears in his eyes, we held his hands and we both told him how much we loved him and assured him we were there. He was happy we made the trip to Rochester and I realized quickly that this would be our last time together.

Love Dangerously

Don't allow the way people treat you to determine how you love, because those people will fade away quickly. How you love will endure forever. I encourage you to live passionately and by all means love dangerously.

Love Is Letting Go

It wasn't until I knew I would never see you again that I kissed you like it was the last time. When I closed my eyes I wished for that moment to last forever.

For the first time I know what love is, it's letting go.

I'll Take My Life To Go Please!

When I order a latte at Starbucks it always includes a 'for here' mug. Most of the time the order taker knows what that means because it's a special order when you deviate from the signature white paper cup. I like to drink my coffee in a ceramic mug when I'm not taking it to-go, which is more often than not. It makes my daily coffee experience so much more enjoyable. It feels like home.

Did you know that in most espresso joints you can order your coffee in a ceramic mug? It's simple, all you need to do is ask. The paper cup is only necessary when your taking life on-the-go. Is taking your coffee to-go really necessary every single day? With the pace of daily living being so hurried and disconnected, I find that twenty minutes to linger with my cup-a-joe is practically therapy. It feels right to start my day stopping to reflect, breathing in the morning and taking time to view the wide angles.

Why An Office Romance Is Like Eating A Twinkie

Have you ever heard of the term work hot? That's when somebody looks really attractive at work only because the options are so sorely lacking, thus making them the hottest person at work. This is typically the most fertile ground for an office romance to grow. I strongly advise against it under any circumstance. I offer you my list of the Top 5 reasons why an office romance is like eating a Twinkie.

1. It never really tastes as good as it looks.
2. You feel like vomiting once you've had your fill.
3. When you realize what it's made of, it's impossible to prevent the self loathing.
4. You still find it difficult to quit after just one.
5. It takes forever to get out of your system.

If you're contemplating an office romance, stumbling on this list of timely reminders is no accident. If you're already entangled in an office romance, all I can say is bon appétit.